I realized I could not “fix” my internal conclusions, but I could learn to leverage them.

When I was ten years old, stepping onto a school bus wearing sweatpants, a t-shirt, and bifocals-- completely unconfident, and feeling a burning desire to fit in-- I realize, now, in retrospect-- I was comfortable in the self-judgment of my unworthiness, and that invited the same from others. 


It was my internal conclusion, not the judgment of others, that led to years of insecure self sabotage.


Gary Bishop refers to three saboteurs that limit our potential, often learned in childhood: conclusions of self, conclusions of others, and conclusions of life.   


Therefore, people who like to pursue fleeting accomplishments-- likes on Instagram posts, wearing specific clothes to fit in-- are also, ten years later, the people who mostly stay in a job they hate because of fear of self-or-others judgment.  


We live out the past, repeatedly.  


For me, personally, life changed towards a creation of Farm Brigge and a willingness to speak with students on vulnerability, when I accepted my own conclusions.  I realized I could not “fix” them, but I could learn to leverage them.  


To create the future we want requires an inward reflection of our conclusions, acceptance of them, and a willingness to design a life- managing and muting those internal conclusions.


Originally published on LinkedIn.